(Voldemort walks through Diagon Alley as people nearby jeer at him.)
Dumbledore: Voldemort! Hey, No-Nose!
Witch: Smell you later!
Wizard: Where's your fucking nose, man?!
(Voldemort hangs his head in despair and sighs as people stare and laugh. Cut to Voldemort sitting in a rhinoplasty surgery.)
Voldemort: I'm sick of all the stares. I want the nose job!
Rhinoplasty Surgeon: This is a big decision. You need to be one hundred percent sure you're ready.
Voldemort: (breathes deeply) I'm ready. Cut me!
(Cut back to Diagon Alley. Voldemort is now walking with a beautifully constructed nose as people look and admire his new appearance. As Voldemort enjoys the new attention, the door to Ollivander's shop swings into him and knocks him to the ground.)
James Potter: Thanks for the new wand, Mr. Ollivander!
Ollivander: Nothing's too good for James Potter!
(Voldemort gets back up clinging his now broken and misshapen nose.)
Voldemort: Ahh f... Ow, my fucking nose...!
(The door swings into him again.)
James Potter: Do you validate?
Ollivander: Uh sorry, no.
(James Potter leaves as Voldemort gets to his feet once more.)
Voldemort: Grrr, I'll get you Potter! Some day!
Wizard: Hey Voldemort, why so... bent out of shape?!
(Everyone laughs as Voldemort shakes with anger.)
Witch: He looks angry enough to kill that guy's baby!
(Cut to static.)