- Hitler: The Allies have taken Berlin! And why? Because you all failed to do what I asked of you! Johann Schmidt, have you found the Tesseract in Norway?
- Johann Schmidt: Mein fuhrer, none of the occult items you ask for exist. A better use of my mein troops would be-- [Gunshot.]
- Hitler: Enough! Frau Haupstein, have you opened the gates to hell?
- Frau Haupstein: I was not able to summon the demonic Hellboy with the help of Rasputin. But I have been working on a military strategy.
- Hitler: Unacceptable! Herr Toht, have you recovered the artifact from Egypt?
- Toht: Um, uh, yes. I have found the lost Ark of the Covenant.
- Hitler: Wunderbar! Where is it?
- Toht: It is uh, here. I have kept the 10 Commandments in this briefcase.
- Hitler: Finally, the key to winning the war! [Laughs.] Americanas, I bet you did not expect keep mein eyes closed, keep mein eyes closed this! [Laughs.] The power of God is mine to command. [Laughs.] Your faces melting, I wish I could see! And your face, too! [Laughs.] The ghosts are so scary. [Laughs.] Let's see where this goes. Melty, melty, melty!
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