Encyclopedia: Encyclopedia Brown is on the case! Aha! Miss September has implants! (overhears his mother talking over the phone and eavesdrop on her in the kitchen)
Mrs. Brown: I swear Hazel, I don't know what to do with that man! He just won't ask his boss for a raise! When I married Roger, he had such balls! Where did his balls go?
Encyclopedia: Dad's balls are missing? (Gasps) A mystery!
(Cut to Mr. Brown's office)
Encyclopedia: (wipes the window outside the office)
Boss: BROWN! YOU REALLY SCREWED UP THESE FIGURES! AGAIN!
Mr. Brown: Yes sir.
Boss: WHO HAS S*** FOR BRAINS?!
Mr. Brown: Me.
Boss: WHAT'S THAT?
Mr. Brown: I do. I have s*** for brains.
Boss: That's better!
Encyclopedia: Hmmm... (takes notes)
(Cut to a bar)
Mr. Brown: (Sobs as his tears fall into his beer)
Bartender: (Cleans glass) Wow. I've been a bartender eighteen years and never seen anyone cry actual tears into their beer. Kudos, chum.
Mr. Brown: (Wipes tear) Thanks.
Encyclopedia Brown: (Disguised as a cowboy and takes notes) Mmmhmmm.
(Cut to a strip club)
Mr. Brown: (Watches happily as a stripper dances in front of him)
Encyclopedia: (Watches stripper and draws stripper's boobs on his notepad)
(Cut to Sea Dee Motel)
Mr. Brown: (Laughs while he unlocks the door) Strippers always get so mad when you assume they're hookers.
Stripper: Well, I'm definitely am one.
Mr. Brown: (Opens door and enters with stripper following him)
Encyclopedia: (Jumps in front of the motel door wearing a ninja suit and takes pictures through the window) Mmmhmmm... Aha!
(Cut to cue-card that says "For the solution of this mystery, turn to page 87" with doorbell sound effect)
(Cue static)