Transcription:Hot Dog Sex

(Cut from static. In a bedroom, a hot dog is lying in a bed while a bottle of mustard is standing nearby.)

Hot Dog: (in a panicked tone) No, no, please! I don't want this!

(The bottle of mustard suddenly splatters a dollop of mustard onto the hot dog as it gasps.)

Bottle of Mustard: (in a calm deep voice) Now rub it in. Rub it in all over.

(The hot dog lies down sobbing and rolls all over the bed, coating itself with the mustard while staining the bed and the cover.)

Bottle of Mustard: (turned on) Oh yeah, that’s the stuff.

(The hot dog continues to sob and rolling around in the mustard stained bed.)

Bottle of Mustard: (whispers) Oh yeah, I smell it. I can smell you from here, oh my goodness. (Moves closer to the bed.) Oh, if I puncture you, you’re gonna ooze juices.

(Cut to static)