Transcription:Bionic Woman

(Steve enters carrying Jaime.)

Steve: There's been a horrible accident!

Rudy: Oscar, bring me a shovel and a can of gasoline.

Steve: No! I want you to rebuild her, like you did me!

Oscar: Steve, your bionics cost us $6,000,000. We can't just...

Steve: Come on! You have the technology. You say it all the time! "Steve, we have the technology." You won't shut up about it.

Rudy: Fuck it! Put her on the table.

Steve: Great! Now, while you're in there, I have a few ideas myself.

(Jaime awakens.)

Oscar: Now, Jaime, don't be alarmed. We've rebuilt you. You are now a "Bionic Woman!"

Jaime: Wa...waite, did you...give me breast implants?

Rudy: Oh, uh, that's where we put your batteries. Steve said you have room to spare.

Jamie: My, my arm. I can't feel my arm!

Oscar: Relax, relax, it's now completely robotic. Let me just fire it up for you.

(The arm starts moving up and down.)

Jaime: What's wrong with it?

Rudy: Oh, Steve said your arm gets tired when you...polish...stuff.

Oscar: We also reinforced your knees, so you could be on him for hours without getting sore.

Jaime: I want to talk to Steve!

(Enter Col. Austin with a smile.)

Steve: Right here, baby, right here! Oh, wow! Great job, Goldman! Oh. Didnif have time to fix her nose.

Jaime: You son of a bitch! You made me into a monster!

Steve: Woah, is she on the rank? I thought we were gonna tie her tubes.

Jaime: I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!!

(She grabs Steve and, in slow-motion, crushes Oscar and Rudy with his body.)

(Cut to hospital.)

Rudy: Oh, god! I've spent my life creating bionic Frankensteins. Now the shoe's on the other foot.

Oscar: We're alive, but we'll be more machine than man. The irony is...well, it's palpable.

Doctor: Well, actually, you're not much more than head and stomach right now. You won't live through the night!

Steve: Hey, but you can rebuild us, right?

Doctor: No.

Oscar: Wait, you mean you don't have the technology?

Doctor: No.

(Cut to static.)