Transcription:The Parent Trap 2

Announcer: In 1998, two twins met and reunited their mom and dad in...

Hallie and Annie: A Parent Trap!

[cuts to the parents yelling at each other]

Announcer: Now we find out how it all began

Elizabeth James: I want a divorce!

Nick Parker: Thank God!

[cuts to both Elizabeth and Nick in a hospital room with the doctor]

Announcer: with two little complications

Doctor: You're pregnant.

Both: Aw fuck!

Doctor: With twins.

Both: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

[cuts to the court room where the two parents give each other the death stare while the judge looks confused]

Announcer: and only one solution.

Judge: What? You want to split up twin sisters? You understand that children are not like monetary possessions.

Nick Parker: I do not, your honor!

Elizabeth James: Neither do I!

Judge: Okay, I'll allow it.

[cuts to the nursery where Hallie and Annie are born]

Nick Parker: You go back to England with yours.

Elizabeth James: And you stay here with yours.

Both: And we never let them know the other exists.

Announcer: Sometimes happy endings have truly horrifying, glossed over beginnings!

Nick Parker: Bye forever!

Elizabeth James: Ideally!