Transcription:A Scooby Friday

The Scooby Gang head to Camp Crystal Lake, to look for the machete-wielding spook called Jason Vorhees. They also meet Phyllis Diller and Don Knotts, the counselors. One by one the gang gets killed off, first Shaggy, then Scooby, Daphne, and Don. It isn't revealed whatg happened to Phyllis and Fred runs away. In the end, Velma reveals that Jason is "Old Man Phillips" who was looking for spanish dubloons at the bottom of the lake. Velma then complains that she's still a virgin, so she has sex with Phillips. Throughout the credits, we can hear them doing it.

Quotes:

Velma: The virgin always lives the longest in these horror movies. God, my life sucks!

(Daphne falls through a secret compartment and finds the remains of Jason's mom) Daphne: That must be Jason's dead mother. This explains everything! (Fred lands on her) Fred: That must be Jason's dead mom. This explains everything! Daphne: Fred, your an asshole! And that ascot makes you look gay.

Shaggy: Man, I am one sad dogfood eating hippie.

Phyllis (to Fred): Sex? You? With her? But with that dickie you couldn't bag an old bag like me. (Laughs, then Fred slaps her). Fred: It's an ascot, you old whore! An ascot! (Phyllis punches him)

Phyllis: Well your ass got laid out by this old whore, Dickie!