Transcription:Santa Tracker

(Cut to the Easter Bunny sitting at home, watching TV with a beer in his hand]]

Reporter: NORAD has located Santa's sleigh over eastern Europe. Kids better hurry up and get to bed.

Mario: Can you believe Santa delivers presents all over the world in a single night? He's incredible!

(The bunny pauses his TV)

Easter Bunny: You wanna know what's incredible, Mario? A rabbit that hides Easter eggs. That's incredible. And I don't do it with a fucking sleigh hitched up to a flying deer. I have to fucking hop all over the world. I'd like to watch you hop all over the world, Mario, and I'd like to see you carry a fucking Easter basket full of fucking eggs and see you hide those motherfuckers. ANd if you don't think that's "incredible," maybe you try it one time with no fuckin' apposable thumbs! You try to hold an egg and then hide that egg with THESE, Mario!

(The Easter Bunny's wife peeks into the room noticing his outburst; the bunny sits back down)

Easter Bunny: I'm just sayin' it's not that incredible.