Transcription:Zune Man

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Steve Jobs is outside his mansion dusting off his Ferrari talking to himself:



Steve: Knock, knock… who’s there? Steve Jobs. Well, you’ve made my life awesome. Oh? How gracious of you America.



Cut to superhero “CD” on the roof of Steve’s mansion.



CD: Oh, compact disc, so clear, so crisp. Jobs will pay for making you obsolete. HAVE AT THEE!!



''CD throws a cd at Steve but it’s deflected by something. Steve hears shattering but decides it’s nothing and continues to dust his Ferrari. CD jumps to the ground and confronts another “superhero”.''

 

CD: You’ve ruined my plan.



Zune: What? Jobs would be dead right now if you hadn’t shown up.



<p class="MsoNoSpacing">CD: Who are you?

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Zune: I’m Zuneman!

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">CD: Ah, the legends are true.

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Zune: That’s right.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">CD: There is a sadder hero than myself.

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Zune: Hey! At least I’m not an outdated format that’s only used as a coaster now.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">CD: Oh, no, no, no, no, you’re worse. Your state of the art software and crystal clear sound quality are matched only by your terrible product design and counter-intuitive menu display.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Zune: We’re working on it! AHHHH!!!

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">''Zune attacks CD in hand to hand combat. CD deflects the attack.''

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">

<p class="MsoNoSpacing">CD: Well, for someone with 120 gigs, you move pretty slow.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">''Zune pulls out a zune and throws it at CD. CD gets scratched.''

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Zune: Rut roe, looks like somebody’s got a scratch. Guess I’ll have to buy a new one.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">CD: They have repair kits!

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">''A gunshot is heard. Steve has seen the commotion and has pulled a gun on them.''

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Steve: What are you doing here CD? I told you, you’re over! (CD pulls a cd to attack Steve with) Don’t make me kill you.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">CD: You already have. AHHHH!!!

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Cd runs at Steve but Steve shoots CD several times, killing him.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Zune: He’s dead.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Steve: Who are you?

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Zune: I’m ZUNE!!

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Steve: Really? Wow! What a terrible design.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Zune: (kneals down) Make it quick.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Steve: Hmm, I wouldn’t waste the bullets. (walks away)

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Zune: Please, don’t leave me like this. NO!!

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Boy: Daddy, what’s that?

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Dad: I think it’s pager.

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<p class="MsoNoSpacing">Cut to static