Transcription:Rita's Magic Wand

Rita Repulsa: Hello! I'm Rita Repulsa, enemy of the Power Rangers. Are you unhappy with your penis size? [Laughs.] I can help with Rita's Magic Wand Natural Male Enhancer!

[Lord Zedd enters]

Lord Zedd: What do you think you're doing?

Rita Repulsa: The mortgage on our Moon Palace is due. I'm starting a side business unless you think you'll be conquering Earth any time soon.

Lord Zedd: I-I-I Don't use my name. All right?

Rita Repulsa: As I was saying, Rita's Magic Wand Natural Male Enhancer really works.Just call me when you need help, and I'll make your penis grow.

[cuts to a couple in bed]

Girlfriend: So, what happens again?

Boyfriend: I'm supposed to say, "Rita, make my penis grow," and then [penis grows] Ohh! What the Oh, my God! I take it back. I take it back.

[cuts to the 5 power rangers in their battle mech's]

Red Power Ranger: Another monster hog, Power Rangers. Let's beat it off the planet.

All Power Ranger: Hyah! Yah! Boo-ya! Yah!

Red Ranger: Our punches aren't having any effect. Boyfriend: Uh, yeah, they are! It's as hard as steel.

[Rita Reappears]

Rita Repulsa: That's a Rita Repulsa guarantee!

Boyfriend: My God, help me!

Girlfriend Hold on. I'm leaving a review for Rita's Magic Natural Wand Male Enhancer two stars.

Boyfriend: What the hell is the second star for?

Girlfriend: Well, technically, it works.

Red Power Ranger: We can't let it destroy anymore of Angel Grove. Let's use the Power Sword.