Transcription:Here's Your Problem...

(A black-and-white sequence shows the infamous shower scene from Psycho.)

Narrator: It's your greatest fear. It fills you with dread.

(Norman Bates creeps up on Marion Crane and pulls the shower curtain aside. Marion screams in fright as Norman stabs her to death. Dark blood is seen going down the drain as Marion slumps down.)

Narrator: You find yourself screaming...

(The scene transitons to color.)

Narrator: "Who can I call to fix this drain?"

(A man holding a toilet plunger stands in front of a van labeled "Earl McGarry Plumbing".)

Narrator: Earl McGarry, that's who! He doesn't ask questions...

(Earl is seen in the bathroom with Norman. He is dunking the plunger into the blood-filled bathtub. The blood goes down the drain as it's unclogged.)

Earl McGarry: Here's your problem. You got about four quarts of blood in here. Trivia fact: That's how much the human body holds!

(Earl is seen in yet another bathroom with Donna from the film Ghoulies. He is dunking the plunger into a toilet.)

Narrator: He's experienced...

(Earl pulls up a shrieking Ghouly out of the toilet.)

Earl McGarry: Here's your problem. You got a Ghouly in here.

(Earl is seen in yet another batroom with Dan Gallagher from Fatal Attraction. He is reaching into the drain.)

Narrator: ...And he knows his stuff!

(Earl pulls the body of Alex Forrest, with a bullet hole in her chest, out of the drain.)

Earl McGarry: Here's your problem. You got Glenn Close in here!

(Earl is seen in front of his van. A "bouncing ball" in the shape of a skull is seen bouncing off of lyrics, with the word "horror" in blood-red letters.)

Chorus: No clog's too scary for Earl McGarry... (shriek) ... the horror handy man!!

Narrator: Not funded by the state.