Transcription:The Nerd in Oz

[The Nerd is in his bedroom, finishing a Wizard of Oz book]

NERD: Man, I wish I could visit the Land of Oz. That would be so cool. Sooooo cooooool... Actually, it'd be much cooler to visit a topless beach in France. THAT would be so cool. Sooooo cooooool...

[he falls asleep, you then see him run out of an old farmhouse]

NERD: Hello, French boobies! [discovers he's in the land of Oz] Aw, dang it.

MUNCHKIN: You must put on these ruby slippers and follow the Yellow Brick Road.

NERD: Do you have any roads that go to topless beaches?

MUNCHKIN: Perhaps there are topless beaches in the Emerald City-b-but probably not.

NERD: Can I tap these shoes together three times and wish-

MUNCHKIN: To go to a topless beach? No! The story don't work that way, kid.

[You then see the Nerd wearing drag walking down the Yellow Brick Road]

NERD: [Unenthusiastically] Here I am having an adventure in the Land of Oz. Yay.

[The Scarecrow appears]

SCARECROW: Hi-ya. My head is stuffed with straw.

NERD: Hi, that's pretty neat I guess. [To himself] Wait, this is my dream. So, if I want it to be super cool, all I have to do is dream it. Be super cool... Be super cool... Be super cool... BE IT!

[And just like that, the Scarecrow transforms into Eric Draven]

ERIC DRAVEN: I...Seek...Vengeance...

NERD: Yes!

[Nerd and Eric come into contact with the Tin Man]

TIN MAN: If I only had a heart.

ERIC DRAVEN: Take mine. It has brought me nothing but pain.

NERD: Hang on, let me try something. Be super cool...

[Suddenly, Tin Man becomes Optimus Prime]

OPTIMUS PRIME: Let's transform and roll out and stomp a mud hole in some Decepticon ass so hard we won't stop 'till we're wearing socks made of dry shit!

NERD: Oh, yes!

[You then saw the Nerd, Eric Draven, and Optimus Prime skipping down the Yellow Brick Road singing like a bunch of idiots, they then encounter the Cowardly Lion]

COWARDLY LION: Rawr. I'm just a big old cowardly-

NERD: BE SUPER COOL!

[The Lion turns into Lion-O]

LION-O: Lion-O: leader of the Thundercats!

[The Nerd giggles like a schoolgirl: meanwhile, the Witch is watcing them through her crystal ball]

WITCH: I must have those ruby slippers!

FLYING MONKEY #1: Jeez, chicks and shoes. Am I right fellas? Ha!

WITCH: Flying monkeys, bring me the Nerd and his pathetic friends!

[the Nerd, Eric Draven, Optimus Prime, and Lion-O burst through her wall]

OPTIMUS PRIME: OH, YEAH!

WITCH: What the FUCK?

NERD: Did somebody order some ruby slippers?

WITCH: Okay, fellas. Take it easy.

NERD: Cause here's a special delivery...

NERD, ERIC DRAVEN, OPTIMUS PRIME, AND LION-O: RIGHT UP YOUR ASS!

WITCH: GET THEM!

[The flying monkeys attack; Lion-O pulls out his sword]

LION-O: Thunder! Thunder! THUNDERCATS, HOOOOOOOOO!

[Tries to attack the monkeys, but fails]

LION-O: Can't-ugh-quite--reach them.

NERD: Keep saying "thunder"!

LION-O: Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder!

[The Sword begins to spin around like a tornado, effectively killing the monkeys]

LION-O: Ha, ha, ha, yeah! Thunder, thunder, thunder!

[Optimus Prime tries to shoot the monkeys, but fails]

OPTIMUS PRIME: There too fast!

NERD: Just transform, trust me!

[Optimus transforms, a trailer appears and kills a passing monkey]

OPTIMUS PRIME: Oh, now that's just pride.

NERD: Your magically appearing trailer irritated fans of the cartoon, but now it's your greatest weapon!

[Optimus repeats the transformation cycle twice]

FLYING MONKEY #2: [To Eric Draven] Ha, ha! You'll never win!

ERIC DRAVEN: It doesn't matter. Existance is nothing but frustration and pain. Everything you love eventually leaves you. Misery is your only constant friend.

FLYING MONKEY #2: you're right. [hangs himself]

[Eric wipes a tear from his eye; Nerd takes out the last two flying monkeys]

NERD: Smash!

[The four boys back the Witch into a corner]

WITCH: Come on, now, fellas, I was just playing around with that "kill them" thing.

NERD: Well there are only two ways to kill a wicked witch, and I don't see a falling farmhouse around here.

[With that, the four boys procede to urinate on the Witch, thus causing her to melt while she does that "I'm melting" thing]

NERD: There's only one way this dream could get even better!

[Suddenly, they all arrive at-you guessed it- a topless beach in France]

NERD, ERIC, OPTIMUS, AND LION-O: FRENCH BOOBIES!