Transcription:A Ruined Nation

A news room is shown where a Newscaster is seen informing people about Godzilla's attacks on a map, with icons of Godzilla showing off where he attacked.


 * Newscaster: Godzilla has left the nation in ruins!

Cut to Godzilla seen attacking the "HOLLYWOOD" sign.


 * News Reporter #1: Oh no! California's most treasured Landmark!

Cut to Godzilla seen attacking the Golden Gate Bridge and chomping onto a car.


 * News Reporter #2: Oh no! California's most treasured Landmark despite what those A-holes down in Los Angeles think.

Cut to Godzilla in Chicago, dryhumpping the Sears/Willis Tower, only to destroy it in the process with the pole on top of it.


 * News Reporter #3: Godzilla is pulling some hot stripper, pole action on the Sears Tower or whatever the fuck we call it these days, what is it? W-Willis? I'm hearing Willis Tower

Godzilla is swimming away in the New York Bay.


 * News Reporter #4: And after destroying Manhattan, Godzilla is finally headed back out to sea. (Godzilla looks back and knocks over the Statue of Liberty with his Tail) Oh! Total dick move by Godzilla!
 * Newscaster: Nowhere near water is safe!

A group of people in congress are seen in Des Moines, Iowa.


 * Mayor of Des Moines: It has never been a better time to be a landlocked state! Tourism here in Des Moines is through the roof. We're all rich! (Everyone applauds)
 * Mayor of Des Moines' Aid: (pulls out a phone and whispers into it) This is the mayor's assistant Mr. G. Your check is in the mail.

''Godzilla is seen on the phone with the Mayor of Des Moines' Aid and chuckles confidently that it was them who were responsible for his attacks. A time card appears that reads "6 DAYS LATER" and Godzilla is seen holding a paper check.''


 * Godzilla: (dismay) Arrgh, how the hell am I suppose to cash this?!