Transcription:Season of the Bitch... Pudding

Crypt Keeper: Oh, hello! I was just enjoying the latest best "heller"! (Evilly laughs, but then rips off book cover)

Crypt Keeper: This is actually Dan Brown's "Inferno." It's a piece of shit. Our next tale is something of an "alle-gory"! You might say it's a "meta-gore"! Let's just roll it.

(Cuts to the outside of Bitch Pudding's house, where the title of the sketch appears. We cut to inside the hpuse, where Bitch Pudding is sleeping).Ghostly Voice: Get out. Get out of the house. Get out of the hou-

(Bitch Pudding wakes up.)

Bitch Pudding: Why don't you get your tongue out of your daddy's [bleep]hole so I can jam your mama's [bleep] up there, you [bleep]-gargling pile of monkey spunk? Nothing to say now, huh?

Ghostly Voice: There's just a lot to unpack there.

Bitch Pudding: Well, wake me up when you figure it out, shit stick. (Goes back to sleep).

(The next morning, Bitch Pudding goes to her fridge when she sees the chairs and flower pot of her table are now completely deformed. Annoyed,she flips them over and destroys them). Bitch Pudding: BLAM! Where's your [bleep]-ass art project now, [bleep] nut?

Ghostly voice: It wasn't supposed to be art! It was supposed to scare you! God! Forget it! I'm leaving!

(Cuts to Strawberry Shortcake's house, where she is sleeping.)

Ghostly Voice:Strawberry shortcake!

(Strawberry Shortcake wakes up).

Strawberry Shortcake: Huh? What?

Ghostly Voice: Get out of the house!

(A red substance begins to ooze out of the walls, causing her to Strawberry Shortcake to scream in fear. Suddenly, Bitch Pudding breaks in through her window).

Bitch Pudding: Hey, [bleep] clown, if you're ragging so bad, why don't you take your mama's tampon out of your daddy's [bleep]hole and lick it clean before you shove it up your [bleep]?

Ghostly Voice: Hey, stop talking about my dad's [bleep]hole! I'll-I'll leave town, okay? Oh, FYI, that isn't blood, that is strawberry jam, m'lady The insulation is leaking. All I did was turn the painting upside down. Live with

Strawberry Shortcake: Do you think he was right about the insulation? That could be berry expensive.

Bitch Pudding: Hmm, let's see. That depends on whether I give a [bleep], shit tits! (Make a fanfare noise) Bitch Pudding! BLAM!

(Bitch Pudding jumps out the window).

Strawberry Shortcake: I should really move.

I should really move.

Get out Get out of the house. - Get out of the hou - Why don't you get your tongue out of your daddy's [bleep]hole so I can jam your mama's [bleep] up there, you [bleep]-gargling pile of monkey spunk? Nothing to say now, huh? There's just a lot to unpack there. Well, wake me up when you figure it out, shit stick. Blam! Where's your [bleep]-ass art project now, [bleep] nut? It wasn't supposed to be art! It was supposed to scare you! God! Forget it! I'm leaving! Strawberry shortcake! - Huh? What? - Get out of the house! Hey, [bleep] clown, if you're ragging so bad, why don't you take your mama's tampon out of your daddy's [bleep]hole and lick it clean before you shove it up your [bleep]? Hey, stop talking about my dad's [bleep]hole! I'll leave town, okay? Oh, FYI, that isn't blood. That is strawberry jam, m'lady. The insulation is leaking. All I did was turn the painting upside down. - Live with it. - Do you think he was right about the insulation? That could be "berry" expensive. Hmm, let's see. That depends on whether I give a [bleep], shit tits! Dun dun-dun-daaaa! Bitch pudding! Blam! I should really move.