Transcription:Stomp vs. Audience

(Set in a performance theater)

(Stomp cast rhythmically clangs on their trash cans)

Audience Member 1: (Sighs) I can watch my kids bang on pots and pans at home for free.

(Stomp leader continues clanging)

Audience Member 2: Please, make it stop!

(Clanging noises continue while audience members cringe loudly)

Audience Member 1: Ugh, I can't do it anymore!

(Audience members one by one get out of their seats and exit the theater and demand their refunds. The sounds of creaking seats, doors opening, cash registers, and refund stamps are set to Stomp-like rhythm)

(Stomp leader sees audience members leaving and bangs louder on his trash can lid)

Stomp cast: (Rhythmically) Oh! Hoo-ah! Oh! Hoo-ah!

Audience Member 3: I can't take it anymore! (Pulls gun out, cocks it and kills himself)

(Other audience members follow, sounds of guns cocking and firing are also set to rhythm)

Audience Member 4: MAKE IT STOP!

Audience Member 5: MAKE IT STOP!

Audience Member 6: MAKE IT STOP!

(Sounds of audience members slicing their arms are also set to rhythm)

(Stomp cast does a "big finish", Stomp leader exhales in joy, but is shocked when he sees the remaining dead audience members)

(The last audience member fires self-inflicted gun wound)