Transcription:Dicks With Time Machines

[J.K. Rowling is in an alley, digging in a trash can. She finds a piece of pizza and begins to eat it. A man appears in smoke to the right of her]

Man: J.K. Rowling!

Rowling: Good blimey, are you an angel?

Man: I am from the future. In fifteen years time, you will be a bestselling childrens' book author whose net worth is more than one billion American dollars!

Rowling: I had an idea. . .about a boy wizard!

Man: [interrupting] No! Your books will be about. . . uh. . . a magical raccoon! He has an afro! His name is Squiggles, and he shoots pixie dust out of his bunghole!

Rowling: Thank you! I'll start right away!

Man: [laughs, "Dicks With Time Machines" logo appears] [static]